“Not everyone who knows you has your back”
As I settled into my seat, watching the sunrise through the trees, listening to the birds sing, I found myself reflecting on the day before. The day I have termed as my best day. I had recently reconnected with a friend and as we caught up every day I kept thinking of this quote that I have shared on my Facebook page many times. The idea was that sometimes strangers could have more love for you than someone you’ve known your whole life. As I reflected on that when we talked I felt the distance between us as more than physical. Instead of anger and resentment towards my friend, I had compassion.
I have not officially come out as a witch, but I am. I started on this journey about two years ago and every day I grow as a person. When I set out I knew that it would ostracize those who did not understand. I knew that it would upset others. But I also knew that if I continued past the loud noise, I would find my tribe. I would find those that held me in regard for who I am, not what I have done (Or what they perceived I have done). I knew that there were those that would see past my failings as a body/human and revel in my soul (who I actually am). The very first spell/intention I put into the world was that only those who really saw me as a soul would be drawn to me. That it would be natural and easy, that I wouldn’t have to explain myself, I would just be accepted as I am. I wouldn’t have to change or be forced into a box when I am so much more than what any box could contain. I am more than what any label can define. I made a decision that those who could not see that was not who I wanted in my life.
Not long after I recommitted that promise to myself or that intention, I met a wonderful person. We clicked on every level. I was talking about something that I found inspiring and she looked in my eyes and said, “Where have you been all my life?” Apparently, I had been distracted by loving the wrong people. But when I talked with someone who claimed to love me as my deepest friend, that tribal feeling was not there. And instead of being angry or upset, I got closure because sometimes strangers love us more than those who know us. And it doesn’t have to be soul-crushing or devastating, it can just be what it is. Another step on the stairs of your life, another path explored. It doesn’t have to be the worst thing that has ever happened to you, you can just accept it and grow. You can not force anyone to love and accept you. You have to do it for yourself. Do it so fiercely that you will not accept less than you give yourself.
Sometimes you have days when the most beautiful person messages you and asks how you are and in the same day someone you’ve known and loved for years walks away. That is OK. You focus on the beautiful people that choose you every single day. You focus on the people that inspire you to move on wards and upwards on your life path. Some people cannot accept the path you have chosen and will reject that, that is OK. Not everyone can forge their own way, and that is OK. Not everyone wants to live their lives defined by labels or being put on boxes. We were meant for so much more.
I woke up this morning with a smile on my face, I felt recharged as I sat in love, in the silence of the rising sun. Recharging in nature, surrounded by the things that give me strength and inspire me. Not everyone can see the beauty in knowing your own worth and not accepting less than you deserve. Some will say it is selfish, but I say it is necessary. The flower that is my soul is nourished with these thoughts.